Permission to Rest by Debra Mae White

Author:Debra Mae White
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Debra Mae White

Anne’s Story

Not all calls to rest come in the form of a health-care crisis. Like Julie, Anne entered therapy after uncovering deep wounds. She too used doing too much to avoid the sting of emotional pain.

Anne was an energetic wife, mother, and business owner leading a life that left little room for self-reflection. When the global economic collapse struck in 2008, Anne’s oil-related service business took a big financial hit. The company hung on for a while until Anne’s partner, a man she had long counted upon to hold up his end of the business, defaulted on a loan and declared bankruptcy.

“My partner was my original backer and handled the books. It looked like he began playing Russian roulette with our bank deposits,” Anne recounted. “When he walked out the door, I was left behind to pick up the pieces.”

A lump swells in Anne’s throat whenever she speaks about what happened next. “Just when I thought it couldn’t get any worse, my husband served me with divorce papers. I lost everything and everyone I believed in and trusted. My life’s work was destroyed. My relationship was in tatters. My kids didn’t know which way to turn. And I was dead broke. Life forced me to stop and rest. It was then that I knew I was no longer in charge. All I could do was surrender.”

The truth was, Anne’s marriage had been unfulfilling, but she had long turned a blind eye to the problem. She had stayed with her husband for the sake of the children and to keep up appearances. By burying herself in her work, she kept a safe distance from the dysfunction that had developed. She stayed busy instead of stopping to rest, because stopping to rest would have meant having to face the pain of a failing relationship.

As Anne discovered, those of us who have lived action-packed lives may find it difficult to shift into a lower gear.

“Life became a tug of war; the more life pulled me, the more I resisted. Time and time again, I had to let go of what I thought would always be mine to keep. The harder I struggled to hold onto the life I used to have, the more miserable I became. When I would finally stop and rest, my life would find a natural rhythm and a sustainable balance between activity and stillness.” Resting and mastering the art of letting go gracefully were the key skills Anne needed in order to begin living authentically.

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